You know what the best thing in the world to hear is? "The case settled".
Just sayin'...
Soooooooooo, hello Friday! I've missed you. I'm also excited about sleeping in tomorrow, spending time with some fam as well as the Super Bowl. I need to figure out what fun treats I'll be making in honor of it, maybe some searches online. Let's see.
Anyhow, last night was edifying. A lot of things were clarified, something's I needed to hear about a situation that concerned me but due to lack of information, I was in sort of a black hole over has become crystal clear. Thanks to my alpha nature I was going nuts because of it. Now, I'm calm. Although what I heard wasn't necessarily what I wanted to but knowledge is power, right? I have the tools within my arsenal to make some good decisions, to chose a path and have even managed, within a few short hours, come to terms.
You know, I hate to admit to this only because this totally shatters the persona I've crafted of total badassishness (that's a word). *Sigh* Total tragedy.
Okay, to be serious here for a min...I'm not that complicated as a person. I'm fairly straight forward. I'll tell anyone what I like and what I don't. I'm pretty clear about my 'go' and 'no go' list as well. Usually, if I think you're worth my time or effort (and love) I'll give you a cheat sheet of things to arm you with regarding my bad days and how to get around them and me. I'm not about setting people up for fails of any sort. I'll even tell you how to reconcile with me if you've done something particularly shitty. (Hint: The spoken word coupled with body language and intonation is key here.)
Taking what I've written above into consideration, it all boils down to the fact that I'd rather be happy than pissy. Being mad takes too much energy, effort, time, brain power. Why brain power since being mad is an emotion? Because for me, anger leads into wanting to exact some sort of devious revenge and that's where the brain starts working. And then as a bonus because my stupid brain really never shuts off...there's the part of where I keep asking questions internally such as: what did I do, why did this happen, but I was so blah blah blah...
...oh the questions are endless. I'm just not down for all this nonsense, Folks. I just don't. I may be a very philosophical person but not this type. My brain works far too hard as it is, I really hate pushing it.
Maybe the fact that I'm, at the core, a little lazy explains things. I don't mean in the sense of work and general life stuff, in that way I'm active. But I'm a simple person in so many ways. People look at me, see woman and automatically make a snap judgment that I'm all about the drama. Nope. Absolutely wrong. I abhor drama even though it seems like recently all I've been associated with has been precisely that. Oh me.
Truth: Most days I just want to go home, watch some mindless television, read a good book, chat with a few close friends, play a game possibly and then drift off to sleep. I hate being up all night long unable to sleep, thinking nonstop, spinning my wheels. It's exhausting! (Unfortunately that's the type I can be, hence it's even more inconvenient because this goes directly against the whole lazy nature.) My idea of a good time has never been trying to 'get over' something because it seems like an epic waste of time and takes too much time. If I could, I'd snap my finger and that would be a wrap. I would be over 'it' (whatever it is). So doesn't happen. Alas for me getting over things is a process.
Anyhow, I'm going to try to get back to work while staying awake. I had Chipotle for lunch and now I feel like a beached whale. Good stuff.
Have a good weekend, Lovelies. <3
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