Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Ramadan 2014 Day 3 - Tuesday, July 1


 
Well the first day of July is here.  Hard to believe that more than half the year has passed.  Feels like time flies the older I get which is something every older person says.  One year leaches into another seamlessly with me barely noticing.  Then again I’ve stopped noticing the big things, so never mind these little ones, right?  Still I can’t help but think in the beginning of each year that I have so much time but in reality I blink and it's another new year.  Fact is, all the time, is never enough time.

Here’s a good example:  last night (June 30) I was informed by a close friend that he was in the hospital, after having suffered a minor heart attack.  He's only 40.  He's already had 2 in his life as well as a stroke.  This guy is the walking talking poster boy for why stress management is important, seriously.

As he filled me in on the details, I sat stunned, listening to his tired voice and feeling a mixture of sympathy and frustration.  The answer to his health issues was easier than he could even fathom and clear to me.  Then again I was standing outside looking in.  My vision was clearer than his and we never see what’s right in front of us, do we?  But this is what I’ve taken away from my friend’s heart attack, here's the next lesson I'll be learning during this Ramadan I suppose, besides patience:  Mastering the art of relaxing and slowing down.

No, this wasn't written out anywhere in the Quran.  There isn't a verse that says 'seriously dude, you need to chill out' although seeing something like that would be fairly awesome.

However, I'm somewhat educated about my religion (not a lot but just enough to be able to write about it without looking like a presumptuous know-it-all) and it doesn't take a scholar to understand what the basic message is here.  Let me break it down for you, my beloved readers.

In Islam, it's important to slow down, to rest.  And in fact it's built right in to the very practice of the religion itself.  For instance, most by now have heard that we are required to pray 5 times a day.  Sure, it’s a totally physical action of devotion, unlike other religions where praying basically is a quiet internal act, ours is all up and down and bending and standing and side to side....Sounds tiring?  Well it is but the truth remains that if you are somewhat following the edicts of God and are in fact praying the prayers those 5 times a day, then no matter how busy you are, you are being forced by the word of God alone to slow down. 

There’s also this thing that Muslim’s do which is a good example of what I’m trying to say.  It’s called Ibadah (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ibadah) that kind of proves my theory that Islam is all about rest and relaxation.  I’ve never believed that worshipping Allah was to simply pray 5 times (don’t misunderstand me, that’s one ginormous aspect).  Do digress for a moment here: to be honest, I do believe (and this is only my belief alone) that certain folks can pray if they’re OCD enough, out of fear or even habit.  Sometimes it’s about just the motions and the reciting of the same two verses over and over again as you’re on autopilot. 

Anyhoo…to me I also never quiet thought that my religion is all about trying to convert anyone nor continuously and unabashedly stating that you are right while everyone else?  Wrong!  Um, no.  My religion sounds arrogant but it’s not.  It encourages to ask questions and debate and talk.  And although it may not accept other religions that doesn’t mean the Muslim’s do not embrace those not of our religion. 

Sure many reading this may be thinking ‘what about the cries of infidel and jihad?’  My answer:  like so many other religions, the word of God is often twisted and turned to support the cause of one person or a small group.  Use your brains folks, no religion that so respects its neighbor basically says “c’mere lemme kill you because you aren’t Muslim”.  Nope.  Islam = tolerance (believe it or not).  Don’t believe it?  Well pick up a Quran and you can see for yourself.    

To me, religion is personal.   So personal in fact that it’s a whisper between me and Allah.  I do not need to advertise it or assure anyone else about my Imaan (faith) again that is between me and my God. This is where Ibadah comes into play.  Basically I think the best way to describe what it means (aside from the Wikkie link I provided) is to say that it’s discourse between you and god.  Sounds nutso, right?

Well hold on, it’s not.  This is akin to what pastors do in their pew when they sermonize and the congregation goes ‘amen’ or ‘yes lord’.  But this is internal and private.  You’re often sitting alone with rosary beads in your hands or may be reading passages from the Quran.  Ibadah is very calming and forces you to slow your otherwise frazzled bootay down.

Well, I would write more examples but to be honest the day has been…interesting.  Besides last night where my friend told me the news about his heart attack and me subsequently giving him lectures about how to handle his stress and may be not go back to the hospital ever again (because if he did I would find him and kill him because I genuinely like him so him dying…not cool), I came to work and ended up breaking into an allergic rash from some critter that had bitten me inside my home.  Awesome. 

And then..the USA vs Belgium game.  OHMERGAWD!!!!! Can you say ‘stroke’?  I nearly had one along with tiny little heart attacks throughout the 2nd 15 minute overtime.  In fact I’m going to stop thinking about it now because I’m going to have heart palpitations again and I’m just too light headed to deal with that at this moment.  

But the convo with my buddy (you know, the one who had the REAL heart attack?  Yea that guy) gave me food for thought.  In a flash I relived those days when I too didn’t understand what the word “rest” meant.  Nor the myriads of words that go hand in hand with that one.  The only reason I wasn’t a total hypocrite in what I was telling my buddy was because I had visited an emergency room a few years ago after believing I was having a heart attack.  I took that incident and taught myself that nothing and I mean absolutely NOTHING, is so important that you die over it, most certainly not no stinkin’ job. I learned stress management, how to say no and how to even walk away on occasion without thinking that I was letting anyone down. 

He listened but knowing him, he won’t take my advice that easily.  Knowing him, he will struggle with his internal need to be a perfectionist and prove himself in a profession that is very new to him.  Knowing him, I’ll have to go see him and slap him upside the head and tell him to ‘knock it off’.  He knows I’ll do it also. 

Here’s the funny thing though (not haha funny but rather ironic), in the last several months I’ve been doing precisely what my buddy has been doing.  I‘ve been tirelessly trying to prove to my new colleagues that I am good at what I do.  I work all sorts of stupid OT and weekends, I monitor my phone closely for client emails or whatnot and I’m always running schedules around in my head and making workflows.  So at the end of the day?  I indeed am a bit of a hypocrite.

Fine, as hypocritical as those words of advice had been to my friends, I will strive to make them non-hypocritical.  I’ll set an example.  In fact last night (I’m writing this on the 2nd of July) when I went to a quaint trendy coffee shop in my hood with my cousin to enjoy some tea after breaking fast, I ignored incoming emails from work.  National security nor was anyone’s very life dependent upon me answering those emails so…they could wait.

Wish me luck in trying to perfect this lesson as well.  Sigh…oh boy I have so much to learn, it’s endless. 

InshAllah, Allah will see me through.

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