Male Fashion Oppression

Today I was out enjoying the sunshine with 2 colleagues, as I’m sure most of us in my fair city probably is or will be doing.  Needing a much deserved break from sitting at my desk staring at a computer screen, I was more than relieved to make the trek outside in order to soak in some vitamin D.  As we stood there, letting the wind have its way with us and not cringing away from it (oh happy day), one of my colleagues looks down, carefully picking lint off the left pant leg.  It was persistent in being one with his person so it took a bit of doing.  As he does so, he explains to us how his mother recently gifted him with khaki pants.  He then goes on to say how much he hates khaki pants. 

I look at the pair he’s presently wearing and ask, ‘are those the pants?’ 

He nods sort of glumly.  I profess not to understand why he hated the offending garment so very much.  They were nice, fitting well.  But he had his reasons, which he shared.  He said he felt like a ‘douchebag’.  Now folks, you know how much yours truly j’adores this word.  I’ve used it liberally in the past and therefore had to bite back a laugh of glee at his use of it.  Why did I withhold laughter though?  Well because this was serious.  By all indication of body language and intensity of voice he did feel like a douche and since I understand what that’s like (well I’ve never felt like a douche but I’m a female and deal with a whole other host of things that I may experience due to clothing choice such as believing that I look (but not limited to) bloated, fat, gross, ugly, etc…) sympathy was quickly in the offering with a nod. 

It’s funny though, how we look at ourselves.  Yes, I’ve written about this before, so stop rolling your eyes.  This is my blog which means I can be redundant.  And I think this topic is worthy of multiple repeats. 

The clothes we choose on a daily basis actually do lay the groundwork for how we will possibly feel throughout the rest of the day.  Haven’t you ever realized this?

For me, when I walk out with ‘those’ pair of ill fitted pants and a shirt that is slightly wrinkled, I guarantee you the proceeding day will not be full of sunshine and roses.  Or at least my attitude won’t be.  Those are the days it’s best to just avoid me.  You see me walk in with my hoodie (the infamous one) then just turn right around, Cupcake, and walk away.  Trust me when I say, you do not want to deal with me.  However when I stroll in with my sassy boots, the cute new top that fits just right and a skirt that swishes around me, oh yea, come talk my ears off, I’m liable to welcome it as well as encourage it.

Side bar: In my youth, fashion wasn’t particularly important to me neither did I understand its significance.  That probably explains my lack of popularity as well.  While other gals were buying stuff from The Limited or Gap, I wasn’t.  In fact mom had to drag me to the store and force me to try on clothes.  To be honest, to this day I hate doing this.  If I wanted to undress, I’d do it at home and make sure I have way more comfy clothes available in which to get right back into, preferably a ratty t-shirt and a pair of almost falling apart sweat pants (totally yummy mental image, right?). (You’re wondering why I side-barred this?  If I don’t somehow squeeze some random childhood trauma/experience into each and every entry of my blog, it isn’t really my blog, now is it?)   

This conversation got me to thinking, which always leads to a blog.  Have you ever noticed how you may have a different hop to your step when you know you look good (although some of us would first perish before actually admitting that out loud).  And when you feel bad or just simply ‘meh’ that too reflects only but too clearly in your outward appearance.  Maybe M (the colleague in question) wasn’t feeling too up to scruff?  He did point out that this particular dislike of khaki’s stemmed from the fact that they are common.  In fact even as he said this two men strolled by and I bit back another smile.  But this got me thinking even more about men’s fashion.  You guys really don’t have many choices, do you?  Women have a plethora of clothing options that can boggle the mind while for men, well it’s a shirt, a jacket, pants, shorts and…well okay if you’re super adventurous (and a Scott) a kilt, other than that…not much, right?  May be faced with such limited options, I would be depressed too?  May be those darn khakis are representation of men’s fashion oppression?    May be I’ve finally lost my senses and am ranting. 

Btw, here’s an interesting fact about my desi male counterparts: they do love themselves some khaki’s.  It’s like their fashion go-to.  I can’t prove this to be a fact, I mean there are no studies floating around out there that Harvard has conducted providing scientific evidence and if there is, seriously find something else to research.  But based on pure observation, I can tell you this is true enough.  If you have 10 desi men standing around, I can assure you at least 7 of them are wearing khakis while the rest are wearing ill fitted nasty jeans.  Did I drop a knowledge bomb on you?  I think I did.

Take yourself off to absolutely any IT company here in the states (I can’t speak for the international crowd since I don’t live internationally) and you’ll see a bevy of brown walking around with their crisply pressed light colored pants, tucked in button down of any various color (mostly plaid or white) and perfectly combed locks.  These are men who always have a slightly ruffled dazed look about them as if they’re lost without a computer monitor in front of them and they smell slightly, not totally, of masala.  Or they reek of cologne.  There is no good in-between for my peeps, clearly.

Anyhow, thanks to this colleague of mine, I probably will start noticing the plethora of khaki wearing dudes about DC.  And will sniggle in the process.  I do profess to wonder still why he thinks wearing these particular pants make him look like a douche.  I guess I’ll have to have a follow-up convo regarding it and I’m also fairly positive that I’ll report back.  Look for the update in case you had a burning desire to know as well.

Oh, side note, when this work buddy asked me to send him my blog link (which I did so with haste) I warned him that he could become blog fodder.  I don’t know if he totally believed me but now he knows, I ain’t playin’.  Absolutely anything at all in the world can become a topic in which I will wax on about.  I know, you guys can send him notes of gratitude since he was the engine that drove this blog.  Try to keep the hate mail to a minimum.