Oh jeez, what a bleh weekend.
First, I worked both Saturday and Sunday. So no bueno. I was not appreciative when a client called me at 10:30am on Saturday to yack at me about this, that and the other. I love how quickly I can put my work hat on and assure him in my most dulcet tones that he was fine, he wasn't bothering me, I had nothing better to do on a beautiful sunny morning anyhow, most certainly not living any semblance of a life. Nah, he could totally bother me WHENEVER! : )
After which I jumped on line and started to ruin just about everyone else's Saturday along with my own. Doesn't this just make me a total peach?
Saturday night, however, we had another 3 month program. I've mentioned this before but as a refresher, these are the music 'recitals' (for the lack of a better term) where my Ustadji's (aka Dad) students perform. Like a showcase. I used to be a wreck before these gigs but I guess to some extent I'm getting used to them hence the nerves were few and far in-between. Then again 15 minutes before taking the stage to perform the duet with N (my cuz), I was responding to emails from work. Again, isn't my life stellar?!
Here's a truth one can't deny: work can kill damn near any joy in the world.
How did the performance go, you may be wondering? Terrible. Well not precisely but it wasn't good by my standards, which are super low to begin with because generally speaking I blow. N, as usual, was sublime. Her voice gives me a complex but weirdly enough in a good way. The natural gorgeousness of it is stunning and next to her I sound like a constipated elephant. I can just imagine how many people first hear her sing, then I start and they're mentally thinking, "please stop, please just stop and let her take over". And no, there is no jealousy towards my bestie. She has been blessed and even when I sit there and hear her, I want not to sing so that she's not interrupted.
She did a terrific job although guaranteed she will say she sucked. I, however, lost tempo all together and my bro who was accompanying us gave me this "what the hell are you doing" look that had me giggling in the midst of it all. It's a good thing I was so damn distracted by work otherwise I would have left immediately after wards, found a cave and huddled within till the year. And I always feel bad when others feel obligated to say 'good job'. I know they're thinking, 'boy you really stunk, what the hell was all that?' in reality. And I tried to avoid stopping too long to speak to anyone so that they didn't have to feel obligated to give me kudos but it couldn't be helped.
The good thing is, the otherwise 2 hour drive to the venue was cut in half on the way home due to no traffic anywhere (did everyone leave town?) while I was yacking with N regarding post-performance agonizing.
I fell into a fairly dreamless sleep which is good because lately I've been having some fairly twisted dreams that I cannot recall for reference sake right now but I know that every morning I wake up feeling slightly discomfited. You know, like something is so off and you can't put your finger on it?
Sunday, I got up and went to Starbucks to get my java fix, admiring the cute kiddies who were skipping in with their fluffy crinoline dresses holding their parents hands and beaming from ear-to-ear. It's always fun to drive by churches on Easter Sunday as the congregation pours out in their finery, smiling, laughing, uplifted. They must feel how we Muslim's feel when we leave Eid prayer : ) Ah, truly how alike are we?
Now is...Wednesday. Oh jeez, have the days flown by so swiftly that I had to pause for a minute to think about it?
Yea, well let me just continue with my update.
Monday was hell, Tuesday was hell and Wednesday...for what I've already gone through...has been hell.
End of story.
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