Monday, January 13, 2014

False Advertisement!


I was getting ready for work a few days ago and this interesting sorta ‘pretty’ commercial came on television.  It was of a very handsome man (which is what probably stopped me long enough to watch) who was waiting at the head of an aisle dressed up to the nines.  He looked sort of nervous which morphed into a smug half grin.   Soon enough the camera pans to the reason he in fact looked like this:  his bride was walking towards him bedecked in a flowing gown that probably was the very embodiment of so many little girls fantasies. 
Even I sat mesmerized.  The woman herself was gorgeous, blushing just so, shyly looking at her groom who waited for her as she floated closer.  It was a sweet advertisement I thought to myself, well done.  Sighing, I turned away and continued to prep for work.
I guess the company that was paying for the ad has more money than they know what to do with since while I was pulling on my favorite fuzzy boots the thing aired again.  This time though I focused on the words and…wait…what?  I sat quite dumbfounded.   I heard the voice over of the groom, a pleasant soft spoken resonance within it, talking about how he’s not the focus of anyone’s attention, how he’s the ‘invisible man’ and goes onto say how the wedding is ‘all about the bride’ and how for the bride, it’s ‘all about the dress’. 
Okay folks, I’m an old married woman, 17 years and counting (MashAllah).  May be this fact alone makes me ‘out of date’ in understanding this sort of social thinking.   I can’t say I remember everything about what my own wedding was like other than pure chaos.  Sure important parts drift to  mind, how he looked, how I felt, how I sensed as if I was a 3rd party sitting somewhere watching me go through the motions.  But what is most easy to recall was that for most of the engagement period, as the day of the wedding approached, I wasn’t sweating the small details of the event itself, I was more worried about the bigger things like “I’m going to be someone’s wife,” “oh crap does he expect me to make him breakfast every morning?”  “Am I supposed to pick out his ties or match shirts to socks?”  “Hold up, so I have to care about someone else’s life along with my own?”  These were the things that shot through my 23-yr-old brain as I prepared myself to be bound to another for the rest of existence.
And I don’t think anyone could say for a moment, knowing who I was then (and who I am now) that I would be more worried about my dress than the man himself.  Here’s a possible unknown fact to my non-desi readers:  in our culture, the groom’s family/groom provides the bride with her wedding outfit(s) (this includes everything from toiletries to shoes, even underwearK) while the same happens to the groom.  I never saw my wedding dress until the day before that rainy August evening.  And neither did I ever think to ask about it.  I know this is highly unusual and I don’t know many women who have been quite that lax about such a thing but I never claimed to be normal (as you’ve probably noticed).  Do I think others should do this?  Of course not!
Anyhow what had me outraged about this ad was the simple fact that it seems to say to the world that it is alright for the woman to be more focused on something as silly as the dress (or other wedding details) rather than the man she’s planning to spend the rest of her life with in wedded bliss.  And adding insult to injury, the man knows this as well as accepts it.  Um…what?
Hello folks, to me this picture seems all jacked up.  This is so ‘effed that I don’t know where to start with this ‘rant’ I’m about to take off on.  I had thought this would be a perfect blog topic to break the long dry spell I’ve recently gone through with my writing but that was days ago when I first spied this ad.  And had I typed this then, it would have been full of far more curse words than appropriate.  Judiciously I decided to wait a few days and due to a rigorous work schedule I haven’t had a chance to refocus while in the meantime there was a distinct cool down period.  Or so I hoped.  Obviously not.  I’m still sort of hot under the collar.
Let me ask you something crazy here which no one else may have ever bothered to ask.  I warn you, this may be a little disconcerting, the question itself.  You may in fact sit back and really get them tiny little cogs in your head to start working.  Hang on to your thongs/knickers/tightiewhities or whatever else it is you chose to put on in the morning (There’s an assumption here that you do indeed wear undies and if you don’t, please do not share.  The other assumption is that you in fact put on fresh underwear every day.   Once more, if you don’t, please don’t feel the need to make my blog into your confessional.).  Here it is:  Possibly, Little Cricket, don’t you think that instead of focusing all your energy and attention around the details of ONE very important day, you actually focus on setting up the right foundations to what will in essence make up the rest of your marriage/life? 
Through the years I’ve had brides-to-be (friends, not just strangers off the street which would be plain ol’ weird) come ask me what I was like when I was preparing for the day in which I would be connected to another forevermore.  To one particular individual that had panic in her eyes along with a certain gleam of insanity, I told her, ‘I didn’t sweat the small stuff.  The wedding isn’t important; it’s all the days after that is what I was intent on getting right’.  In that instant, I totally lost her.  The confused stare she gave me said that in loud volumes.  So I sighed, sat her down and explained.  I said something like this:
There is no such thing as a perfect wedding.  No matter how ‘impeccable’ you hope it will be, something will inevitably go wrong.  And that’s okay.  So what?  How can that one single day be more important than the rest that will follow? 
More blank confused looks thrown at me as she says “yes, but I mean you dream of this day since you’re a little girl.  You deserve it to be everything you envisioned.”
More sighing, on my part of course, True, but I wanted to run away and join the circus when I was a kid.  I can guarantee you that it’s a good thing that didn’t come to pass.  I think that one of the best things about growing up is the very fact that we adjust our visions of the world/universe/reality.  We hopefully figure out what is possible, what isn’t, we accept what we can do and what we can’t do and most importantly we take into account the fact that all things simply cannot always go our way.  By the time you’re making the decision to get married, you should have at least that little bit of maturity within you, right?
Well, not right.  Not everyone I realize is as mature as I was when I was taking the decision to marry P.  And for all my immaturity towards life (and there was plenty) I never fooled myself into believing that being and subsequently staying married to one man for the rest of my life (without actually killing him in the process) would  be simple.  I knew that it would take some major work…on both of our parts.  Although I also admit that I had no clue, none at all, as to how hard it really can be sometimes, at least I wasn’t sitting there more worried about the trivialities than the big picture. 
And this leads me to mull over:  do more marriages fail in this day and age because societies focus is so very…well, unfocused?  Have we basically lost all sense of what is important?  How wrong does the general populace out there actually have it?
A few of you may be thinking that I’m way overthinking this. May be even wondering why I would take a simple advertisement and blow it so totally out of proportion?  My answer back to you would be, why not?  May be YOU should?  And follow that up with the question:  Can something as innocuous as an ad be an accurate representation of the national psyche?  Frankly, I believe it can.  Companies (like the bridal store that aired the spot) which can afford to spend a lot of money during prime time most likely has done their due diligence.  I’m assuming they pour over marketing specs (or whatever you call them), have done test runs, and checked with legal before actually airing.  These aren’t stupid people (in a business sense at least I hope).  They know what will appeal to the mass before it goes up on the screen.     
And since my peepers have seen it, doesn’t that mean that this nonsense was vetted and the marketing geniuses sitting wherever they’re sitting have determined that there will be consumer appreciation?  That the lemmings of the world will watch that advertisement and run, and I mean run, en mass, to the store to buy themselves the most important thing that will be at their wedding…the dress.  Oh how sad is this thought?
The fact is that the right veil, the best champagne, the glittery opulence of the wedding all fades eventually in the memory.  We’re left with some pictures and may be a few retold stories but the bulk of it all goes away.  What we deal with every day after that is getting up to that person who you walked to at the end of the aisle and my advice is, instead of the dress being the most important thing to you that day, make sure it’s the person. 
Take this advice from a woman who is old, cynical yet a realist.  This is what counts most.

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